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It is NOT a compliment

Home A Neighborhood Rhode Island Ave It is NOT a compliment

It is NOT a compliment

Aug 27, 2009 | Posted by User Submission |

I will finally be out of this neighborhood I have lived in for one and a half years (too long!), to a place where street harassment is minimal to nonexistent (so far). I am counting down the days, hours, minutes and seconds to when I live in an environment where I can walk from my place to the Metro and back without being leered at, catcalled at and talked at (not “to,” at) by virtually every single man I walk by.

These last few weeks here have been grueling. Not a day has gone by where guys haven’t slowed down their cars to match my walking pace, or yell obscenities at me because I didn’t want to stop to give them the time of day, or give unsolicited offers for rides or to “roll with” me and other foolish nonsense. Each day I have to walk to and from Rhode Island Avenue Metro I have to steel myself to the ridiculousness.
There are too many incidents these past few days to talk about, but yesterday’s grocery store trip was a pain. I had to redeem my change at the Giant’s Coinstar machine, and as I walked to the store, two guys driving a Budget truck yelled “SEX-AYYYYYYYYYY!” at me. They then stopped and watched me walk. I pulled out my phone in case they wanted to do more than watch me, and luckily they continued driving. Then leaving the store, some guy was hanging out near the entrance/exit offering to carry senior citizens’ bags, but turned his tact on me into an offer to “walk and talk” with me. I told him I didn’t know him and did not want to get to know him, and to leave me the hell alone! All it did was go in one ear and out the other.

I am tired of every single man I walk by being so hellbent on saying “Hi” to me. It’s never a simple hello because the subtext is clear. They’d never demand a guy to respond to any of their “hi’s.” They don’t even say “hi” to guys who walk by! And I cannot stand men who need to refer to me as “Shorty,” “Boo,” “Slim,” “Baby Girl,” “Sugar,” “Nubian Sista,” “Ms. Lady,” “Lovely,” and every other name in the book except “Miss” or “Ma’am.” I am sick of it!

I am tired of my family and friends telling me these guys are trying to “compliment” me. It is NOT a compliment coming from someone who doesn’t respect me or value me as a human being. It is NOT a compliment coming from someone who sees me only as an object to leer at and catcall at.

I am moving out of NE DC and into the suburbs in a few days, and it will be a different world for me. I know I won’t avoid harassment 100% of the time, but any step towards minimizing it is good enough for me. I can’t wait.

Location: 10th NE, Rhode Island NE, Brentwood Plaza Giant

Submitted by Anonymous

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