“You did not need to lean on me like that”

This weird older man who I frequently see on the bus (boards at Rosslyn and gets off immediately after at M & 34th), sat next to me today. Normally he’s skittish about sitting. He used my body like an arm rest when he leaned to pull the chain and put pressure on me. He didn’t say “Excuse me” or anything and it made me uncomfortable.

“You did not need to lean on me like that,” I said, and he ignores me, staring straight ahead. I know he heard me and I know he understood me since he boarded the bus with another older man and had a conversation with him. There was no language barrier there.

I then say “If you asked, I would’ve pulled the chain for you.” The fact that he blatantly ignores me when I state my frustration is aggravating.

Lastly I say, “Sure, sit there and act like you can’t hear me while I call you out on your stupid behavior.” Finally, he looks in my direction, but in this manner of acting like what he did was no big deal.

Luckily the discomfort of him sitting next to me was temporary as he immediately got off at the next stop, but the aggravation still lingers. If I ever see him again (which I’m sure I will) and the seat next to me is free when he boards, I’ll be finding somewhere else to sit.

Submitted by anonymous on 1/10/2011

Location: On 38B bus

Time of harassment: Day Time (9:30A-3:30P)

Do you have a personal experience with gender-based public sexual harassment or assault you would like to submit? Just click here and fill out the online submission form. All submissions are posted anonymously unless you specify.

One Response

  1. radial

    Good for you for speaking up. He may have played it off at the time, but I’m betting that he heard every word you said and that it will have an impact on the way he behaves in the future. We all need to call people on this kind of offensive behavior.