No One Else Bothered

posted in: Adams Morgan | 5

Last winter I was waiting for some friends outside of a bar. I notice a man and a woman in a verbal altercation not more than 20 feet from me on my left. They’re both quite intoxicated. She’s yelling how she’s going to kick his ass, he says he’d like to see her try and is up in her face.

At one point another man walks past the situation and overhears, in the midst of general yelling, the woman’s assertion that she will beat her male companion up. He laughs and says something to the effect of “yea right, you couldn’t take him” and just keeps walking. All the while they’re still very much in one anothers face and it seems like it could get physical.

Then the man grabs the woman by the neck and slams her against the side of the bar, yelling in her face. At that point I walked over and said “Is there a problem?”
The two separated at that point, yelled some more, then took off in opposite directions.

I remember there being some men standing down the corner from where this was taking place. Pretty big guys. But not one of them came over to intervene. I had to. And, I’m not a small woman, but just the fact that no one else bothered to do anything was sad to say the least.

Location: Connecticut and Florida Avenues NW

Submitted by ST

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5 Responses

  1. Anon

    Here is a post about men not interjecting themselves when they are supposed to. The overwhelmingly complex liability issues that any of the “big men on the corner” would expose themselves to (and this poster chose to expose herself to) aside, it seems the message is that men are supposed to impotently withhold their prowess and make no action toward strange women whatsoever, until such time as they are required to fight on their behalf. I’m pretty sure that’s how things work in Saudi Arabia and I cannot agree with the notion that our society should emulate that country. Further, since we clearly do not live in Saudi Arabia and gender equality is protected under law, the only label that can exist to describe men in such a system is as follows: Second Class Citizens.

    • Dara

      Eh, actually no. That’s not how things work in Saudi Arabia. In Saudi Arabia, women’s movements are curtailed and restricted. Men are not expected to defend women but rather, are taught that women are lesser persons and subject to men’s will.

  2. nicki

    Did I miss something? When was the Equal Rights Amendment ratified?

  3. Anon

    Apart from being implicitly stated in the 9th amendment, it has also been exhaustively legislated. Most notably, women are a protected class under the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

  4. Anon


    Please believe me when I say that I am strongly in favor of liberating all people and realizing true equality. I started commenting at first impulsively because much of what I’ve read here struck me as unreasonable. Upon reflection many of the views expressed in this forum are more logical than I initially gave them credit for. That said, I have a short list of specific points that I am vetting with the hope that I will hear some of the underlying reasoning that you use to assist your definition of true equality.